Valentine’s Day For The Already-Engaged

When you were single, you either cursed Valentine’s Day or fantasized about it.

When you were just dating, you crossed your fingers to be swept off your feet on February 14th for a gush-worthy, girl-squealing Valentine’s Day.

When you have a ring on your finger and the date is set and you’re engaged you… {RECORD SCRATCH} What do you do?!

Valentine’s Day is weird when you’re engaged. Your partner might assume that there’s really no need to impress you or win you over anymore. The ring is there. You said “yes.” You’re knee-deep in DIY projects. Eh, Valentine’s Day is a commercial holiday anyway, right, Hallmark? RIGHT?!

Well, no. It doesn’t have to be. True, the notion of impressing or being impressed is not as heavily motivated, but you can still take the annual opportunity to be romantic in ways that don’t require your partner to rent out the entire city of Paris for you. (The French one. Not the Texan one.).

Get sentimental. This is a time to write a poem or a card to tell your partner how much you’re looking forward to married life. It’s even acceptable to go a little more public with it on Facebook: “I just want to wish my fiance @FirstnameLastname a Happy Valentine’s Day! Can’t wait to marry you!” Yes, extra romantic points for the tag.

Flowers to the office are tried and true. This move certainly can’t hurt, but try another fun route: a singing telegram? Cheesy, yes! But so is Valentine’s Day! And it’s not like there needs to be fear of “what if I get dumped over this?” because you’re already engaged! As of now, I’ve never heard of a broken engagement over a singing telegram. And by this point in your relationship, you and your partner know if the sense of humor can handle such a gift.

In the hubbub of wedding planning, it’s easy to forget to be romantic any day of the week. So use the built-in excuse of Valentine’s Day to spend quality, quiet time together at home. Cook together. Enjoy a cuddle and movie on the couch (laptops and iPhones away!). Invite a professional guitarist to come over and serenade you as you eat dinner at the table. In your PJs. This time together is kind of like the calm before the storm and Valentine’s Day is a great day to remind each other why you want to be together forever.

If you decide to do some reciprocal gift-giving, that’s great. Just remember, no one else in the world knows you and your partner like, well, you and your partner. So gift something that is unique and a reflection of your relationship to each other. Chocolates are great, but his mom can buy him chocolates. But you, oh, soon-to-be-wife, you, you know that your history buff hubster-to-be has a thing for the Civil War and the Lincoln era, so that boxed DVD collection of biographies about Honest Abe might prove to be his most favorite gift of his whole life, like, ever. Romantic? Ehhhh, not really. But what’s romantic is the fact that you know this about him and acknowledge it. Remember, don’t play into the commercials on TV with the synthesized music and cheesy voice over behind it about yada yada “limited time for Valentine’s Day” yada yada. Do, however, play into your partner. Your partner is not for a limited time.

So, hurry up. You’ve got six days to set it all in motion! Happy (almost) Valentine’s Day from The Wedding Yentas!


Don’t forget to take a minute to enter you or your loved one into the ketubah giveaway on The Wedding Yentas with Ketubah Studio by MP Artworks! Photo submissions are being accepted right now through February 16th! Details here!